My Portfolio Conference 2: GLO's

Student/ Parent Portfolio Conference

Tuesday, May 15th, 2012

You're invited to come and take a look at my GLO portfolio which showcases the work that I've done over the school year on this day.

http://www.wix.com/dancergrrl16/xoxoerynn

Poem Analysis Essay

Depression (noun) Severe despondency and dejection, typically felt over a period of time and accompanied by feelings of hopelessness and inadequacy.

Have you ever hit the point where you truly felt unwanted and worthless to everybody around you? That’s what people who suffer from depression hit almost every single day of their lives. Some just honestly hate themselves, contemplating/ attempting suicide, inflicting harm on their own bodies, and constantly telling their selves that they’re worth nothing.

About 20% of teens will experience and suffer from depression before they even reach adulthood. And what’s the scariest part about all of this? Their friends, family members, and classmates might never expect that.

My poems, songs, and prose pieces all have to do with pretending that oneself is okay when in all actually, they’re not. The first poem I have, titled the “Mask” is a perfect example of trying to convince the world that you’re fine and dandy, but when you get home and are alone, you tend to break down. The narrator in this poem explains how they are “Spectacular” and “Cheerful all the day.” But these feelings are only a mask as the title implies. And when the narrator strips himself or herself of this mask and lets their true feelings come through, it’s not something you would expect from someone who claims they’re so happy. Now comes a feeling such as “I ache and burn from my very core.” The world would never know how depressed this narrator is or who they really are without looking behind the mask of trying to be happy and give off happy feelings. 

The second poem I chose was “A Scared Little Girl”. The poem was quite graphic in word choice and describing the situation. The narrator in this poem was also keeping secrets inside of her, and she used the metaphor of those secrets being a “Scared little girl inside of her.” To show those secrets being kept. Her secret was in fact her depression and her aching to be happy.

“Welcome to my Life.” Is a song by Simple Plan that I also chose to relate to the theme. The singer uses the words “To be on the edge of breaking down, and no one understands you.” To show the feelings of loneliness, rejection, and much more. The singer wants to convey the point of view of a teenager that’s just not happy with their life anymore and falling into a state of depression.

My first prose piece is titled “The Dark Secret I Could Never Tell Anyone.” It’s about a girl name Katy who always thought she had it all, good grades, friends who cared, and a love for dancing. But she still always felt like she wasn’t good enough. So she resorted to self-harm. “For years, I lived a double life.” She says. On the outside, she was still this bubbly cheerful person. But inside, she was just a girl who truly needed help. Katy said, “Hiding my real emotions made the urges even stronger.” She didn’t truly want to go into recovery until her parents found her in the bathtub with a boiling pot of water on her legs. She finally realized in that moment how out of control she had became, which was a turning point for her. That’s when she decided to sign into a treatment facility and get back on her feet, the healthy way.

The next prose piece I have is “Depth of Depression, My story” Written by Craig T. He claims that he has often been considered an upbeat, positive individual. But as his life goes on and he smiles more and more in public, his depression is getting so much worse. That’s another example of people suffering from depression almost having two different personalities. The way the act around other people and the way they can act when they’re just left alone with there self and their mind.

It’s not a joke. These are real life stories from real people. All these articles, and stories, and poems, are all to connect to the problem of self-deprecation and the fact that it can go unknown by everyone around the person suffering. Everyone is not what he or she seems.

Poetry Links. Open before reading connections.

The Mask 

http://www.bestteenpoems.com/poem/the-mask-2

A scared Little Girl

http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/a-scared-little-girl-2/

Welcome to my Life 

http://www.elyrics.net/read/s/simple-plan-lyrics/welcome-to-my-life-lyrics.html

Poem Connections

The Mask

The first impression I got from this poem was that the narrator uses a “mask” of joyous feelings and pretending that he or she is okay to hide the fact that in all actually, they’re not okay. The words choice the author uses to describe both parts of his/her personality give you a vivid image in your head. For example, saying “Spectacular”, “Live every day”, “Cheerful all the day”, and “A world full of rainbows, not one shade of grey.” Gives you a strong emotion of happiness. But then when it comes to the feelings of sadness the narrator suffers, the word choice is also good at provoking emotion. “I cry, I scream, I bawl.”, “I ache and burn from my very core.” “End it with a knife.” Evokes a feeling of suffering that the narrator is going through that even the reader can feel. This whole poem is a metaphor within itself. It uses the “Mask” to imply the action of trying to cover up your own sufferings. The structure of this poem doesn’t really affect the meaning of it. The last words of each sentence rhymes in an AABB structure in a 4-line stanza. Overall though, this poem is here to tell readers that even the happiest people could still be the ones that are suffering inside, and are just too ashamed to show it. Depression isn’t always a big show. Most times, it’s hidden either purposely or just because the person dealing with it wants to convince themselves that they are fine by being able to act cheerful in public. But that could all be just a show. It could all be just a mask.

A Scared Little Girl

Reading this poem, my first impression was shock and fear for the narrator. She’s been through a lot. She’s keeping all these secrets inside of her. Starting off with the evocative language in this poem, there were a lot of words that evoked strong emotions for me and I’m sure anyone else who reads this poem. The words “Beaten and raped” immediately gave me a strong sense of fear. So did “Her nose was broken, her body bruised.” “Praying that I’ll die”. “Private war.” This poem was also another one of those poems where the whole thing was in fact a metaphor.  The “little girl” That the narrator was talking about was really herself and all the secret she has to keep/ has been keeping. You get that impression after you read the words “Trapped inside of me.” And “Keeping secrets held in is really affecting my health.” Also in figurative language, the line “I’m scared I won’t be able to stop until I‘ve cried a river of tears.”  Is also a metaphor to show that the narrator is just highly depressed and needs an outlet to let her feelings out, in which she physically just cries a lot as shown here. The structure of this poem is an AABBCC rhyming scheme with no stanzas. It’s all just one long poem. I think this actually is better like this because it just makes it seem so much more real. Like it could be a page from a diary as opposed to someone trying so hard to write a poem. Lastly, the final impression I get from this poem is similar to the first one in a way of trying to hide the depression that has taken over a lot of people today. Sharing feelings is hard, but keeping secrets is also quite dangerous for you.

Welcome to my Life

Simple plan

This is a song with very powerful lyrics. My first impression of it actually was relating it with my life. It’s about a teen that is going through a rough time in life, and feels like no one understands him/her, thus they need to share their experience through song lyrics. This is also a song that shows great use of evocative language in the lyrics, but it’s more of stuff for teenagers to relate to than more mature people listening to it. The “Big fake smiles and stupid lies.” Part of the song was spot on as to bringing up feelings of being hurt by other people for me and realizing how fake people can be. Another line that is good for emotion is “To be on the edge of breaking down, and no one understands you.” It provokes feelings of loneliness, rejection, and feeling like not a single person is there for you. There really wasn’t any figurative language in this song. The structure of it adds to the depth of the song though, in my opinion. How it starts off strong, telling you exactly what feelings the singers are trying to convey (“Do you ever feel like breaking down? Do you ever feel out of place?”). and explains more and more along that feelings before going to the bridge (“No ones ever lied straight to your face. No ones ever stabbed you in the back. You may think I’m happy but I’m not gonna be okay.”). And at the end, there’s repetition of the line “Welcome to my Life.” Which is not only the title of the song, but also what’s the main point of the song is, to show people a little glimpse into the life of a wounded and unwanted teenager. This piece shows that there are people going through harsh things like that, and they really want to have a voice and be understood and listened to. Because it’s hard to have to battle depression, or even just be sad alone.